The next day Eleanor planned to prove once and for all that he and Natalie were making a terrible mistake by choosing to raise a special-needs child. I just hope Natalie doesn’t find out about the war going on between him and me, he thought. Maybe I should have told her from the start. Maybe by now she would’ve accepted reality.
That morning Edward found his wife in the kitchen. She was drinking her usual vitamin smoothie and making his favorite mushroom omelet.
— You going to be gone long? — she asked, setting a plate in front of him.
— Not sure. I’ll try to get back early so we can still take our walk. Where are we headed tonight?
— Maybe the ponds. We haven’t been there in a while. We can feed the ducks and catch the sunset. Our daughter deserves beautiful things.
— And how exactly is she going to see them? — Edward laughed.
— She feels what I feel, — Natalie said seriously.
— So when are we finally picking a name?
— Let’s not rush it. We’ll meet her first, then we’ll know. But I’ve got to run — I’m late.
Edward hugged his wife gently, kissed the top of her head, and left to meet his mother.
The road to the town where the care facility was located ran through open farmland. As far as the eye could see, fields of sunflowers stretched to the horizon like a yellow sea. Eleanor sat in silence, as if saving her energy for one final battle with her son.
— How’s Natalie doing? — she asked when Edward turned onto a side road. — Do you understand I’m thinking about her first? She’s the one this will fall on.
— Mom, I know you think you’re helping. But we’ve already made our decision, and this trip is a waste of time. It’s not changing anything.
Edward tried not to sound irritated, but he didn’t quite pull it off.
— Fine. Then I’ll wave the white flag and surrender. But remember this: don’t expect help from me. I’m not rearranging my life around hospitals and specialists with no real hope of improvement.
The car pulled up to the gate. The guard glanced at the plates, opened the barrier, and called Martha right away. She came out to meet them on the front steps. When they entered her office, they found a breakfast spread waiting, but both declined.
— Please forgive us, Martha, but you know why we’re here, — Eleanor said.
They walked through the facility. To say Edward was shaken would have been putting it mildly. Martha had done exactly what Eleanor asked and led them to the wing where the most medically fragile children lived. For one brief moment, he imagined facing that reality every day, with no weekends, no breaks. I could bury myself in work, he thought, but Natalie? Could she really carry this? Maybe Mom’s right. Maybe we shouldn’t tempt fate. Then he was ashamed of himself for even thinking it.
When they returned to the director’s office, Martha said:
— I’m not here to persuade you of anything, young man. But I will tell you this: children like these are often better off here. You’ve seen the level of care. And for Ms. Whitaker’s granddaughter, we could assign a dedicated aide.
Eleanor’s face tightened at the words. She didn’t even want to imagine any personal connection to the child who was about to be born.
— Martha, we discussed the paperwork. Is everything still in place? — Eleanor asked, as if the matter had already been settled.
— Yes, of course. And if you ever wanted to visit the child, there would be no obstacle, — Martha replied.
— No. Better to make a clean break, — Eleanor said flatly.
Most of the drive back was silent too. Just before they reached the city, Eleanor asked Edward to stop at a café. They ordered iced tea and dessert. When the server walked away, she said:
— I’m not asking for your final answer right now. But think about this. If one day you have a healthy child, that child will grow up in the shadow of this one. You’ll give him whatever time is left over. And worse than that — kids can be cruel. They’ll make fun of him because of his sister. He won’t want to bring friends home. Tell me why your future child should suffer because of your choices.
— Natalie may not go along with it, — Edward said, his resistance weakening.
— Natalie won’t know anything, — Eleanor said. — I’ve already thought it through.
— How did the meeting go? — Natalie asked when he got home.
— Same as always. The company got what it wanted, — Edward said, avoiding her eyes. — How was your day?
